Easter

A bright sun rising
Easter brings new life now
Today is the day

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Love goes

Where does the love go

if it seems to run from your heart

Where does that feeling flow

does it get lost in someone’s art?

~

Where does the love jump off to

when your loved one leaves the room?

Does it fly up to a sky of blue

or cause a young flower to bloom?

~

How does the love escape

from your encaged red heart?

Does it kick, claw, and scrape

Or slide out on a horse drawn cart?

~

Oh sweet, sweet honest love

I see you slipping away

As I tap into something from above

I ask you please, darling love, stay.

 

Reaching In: A healing journey

She had enough of the grief and pain

So she stopped at the edge of the big river

The one that runs out to the sea

And she reached in deeply.

Breathing through it all, she started with her head and her brain.

Who knew you could reach inward so deeply?… she wondered.

She probed, and she bypassed the trinkets and baubles

the forks and other cutlery that were bound up by the neurological meandering

and the shiny tinsel and bright blue bows strung to and fro.

She left behind the sea salt sprayed memories

The smells of spring skiing and summer camping trips

The joys of the lovers’ first kisses

The riding of the bicycles and the running of the races

Until she finally found the dark, shiny, silver edged moon stone

The one that had been causing so much pain.

She wrapped herself around the shiny stone, surprised at how light it felt

How easily and comfortably it fit in her psychic fingers and she tugged gently

It did not budge.

Aum shanti, aum shanti, aum shanti

She chanted over and over again, her fingers touching the stone gently, compassionately

Sometimes she was patient, other times determined

Aum shanti, aum shanti, aum shanti

For days and months and then over a year she sat there at the river

The one that runs swiftly out to the seas

And she chanted Aum Shanti.

Aum Shanti again, again, again.

Eventually, slowly, she could feel the stone releasing itself into her psychic fingers.

Its movements were slow and steady, with every breath, with every repetition

Every Aum Shanti

There was a bit of movement toward healing.

One morning…Aum Shanti …and there was a release that was so sweet and kind

It filled her being with love and light.

The smooth rock slid into her psychic fingers and she gently and compassionately

Withdrew that smooth rock of aching pain

Lifting it back through the neurological tangle

Around the baubles, diamonds, flowers, and sunshine

Past the magical musical moments, through the snow storms, and joys of birthing

Near by the celebrations and feasts of delight

Skimming the roots of the inner tree of life.

And she pulled the stone lightly

Right out the top of her head, through a hole made by a beaming white light.

She held the shiny dark pain stone up to her eyes, looking deeply into it

She exposed it to the sun’s bright rays

Held the moonstone of pain to her heart

Inhaled the smell of it, breathing all the while, Aum Shanti

Tossed it from hand to hand to feel its dense yet lightweight nature.

Deeply aware of each moment of movement, she raised her arm and psychic fingers

And with great strength, with the utterance of the mantra,

Aum Shanti, she hurled it out into the swift moving waters of the cold river

The stone did not sink, so she watched it float away through the currents

Released to the river of life, the river of death, the river of all

And out it floated to the one great sea.

 

 

 

 

 

Free from pain at last.

If I Was Nature

If I was a cloud floating on by

Would you look up, breathe, and wonder why

I looked like a dog, a boat, or a fish

Would you smile and make your deepest wish?

*

If I was a sweet morning dove

Cooing from without, beyond, and above

Would you take a deep lungful of cleansing air

And truly release all of your thoughts, without care?

*

If I was a cool and quiet green-blue pond

Would you remember all who made you feel fond

Would you step in deep right here and now

And take a lingering and heartfelt inner bow?

*

Would you recognize your inner light

And begin to give up the perpetual fight

Take a step toward nature and deeply receive

Releasing your suffering, and feeling deep relief.

*

For in nature we can find deep healing

The chance to recognize all we are feeling

Moving up and beyond life’s suffering

And accepting the Spirit’s natural offering.

 

Estimate this

A look across a grey and smoke-filled room

Blue eyes sparkling, gazing up at stars and moon

A baby cries for her mama, alone

A dear old friend rings you on the phone

A day spent laying by the ocean or sea

A little time spent to take care of just me

A room filled with love and light

A song ringing out again into the dark of night

A delicious frosty beverage on a sweltering summer day

A glimpse of the sun slipping out-of-the-way

A silky puppy or kitten to hold close and cuddle

A silly joke or puzzle ,made to befuddle

Icebergs floating down a river blue

A bursting forth of spring just for you

Hot sand burning our feet on a white warm beach

The gold ring flashing by, just out of reach

A day spent with the one you call a sweet lover

Rolling around in the greenest Spring ground cover

A homemade deliciously late breakfast or early lunch

A special drink with your Sunday brunch

The first smile from your favorite child

A love that over the years runs on and wild

*

Estimate the value of a million and one things

And put it into the place where your heart alone sings

Estimate the power of the love and joy you know

And multiply that power to help you grow and grow

*

Estimate this life, as it goes on and on

Hold the power forever and beyond

Estimate the love you need, multiply it by three

And watch it come back again to thee.

*

Estimate this…..

 

Three years later

As the bright sun makes away across the too blue early Spring sky

I recall how you lost your life three years ago, yes that was April as well.

I was not there for your last breaths, just as you were not there for my first breaths.

Yet, it makes no difference now. I never knew if you were there and you knew not if I was there.

There was a great loss of love in our family, in my childhood.

I know now that either you learned to love later or I learned to accept love later.

It was just buried down in there somewhere, beneath the grey muck and pain.

I can picture it now, love beating through the grey muck, a bright yellow feeling of hope.

I can sometimes think of you fondly, of your pride over my accomplishments.

I can push down the stare you provided at the showdown, the blank emptiness and traces of nothing there

I can see clearly now how my own suffering moves me to help others, to connect and care more deeply

And also how it holds me back from others, unable to take the time and make the risk

I can see how everyday my own attachment and aversion to our family impacts me

And then I wish I would take the pain out of my heart pocket

Toss it up into the Spring wind that blows across ice and snow

And watch it fly away back to the universe, scittering away across the river and out to sea

I would also reach in and pull the lump out of my throat, the one that sticks there

Day in and day out, since the day you made me an orphan

An adult orphan, but nonetheless I said it today, I am an orphan

Sometimes too alone in this world to breathe freely

And the vast ocean of loneliness inside reaches a high tide

The waves crashing about in my heart

This three years later.