Graphic Grief

Tears streamed down her face and turned to ice

Plunking on the ground, shattering,

Clink, clank, clunk.

The lump in her throat was splitting her in two

Ripping, shredding, pieces

Her bloody soul splashing to the ground.

How could it be repaired

The freezing, searing, unending pain

Of a too ‘oft’ broken heart?

Screaming, crying, wailing

Red anger bursts out like flames

Burning all who dare to come near.

Someday the tears will melt, no longer made of ice

In the future the shredding will end

And the flames will fade into the distance

Beyond time.

 

 

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Tears

What does it feel like

When those hot salty tears

Escape and run down cold cheeks

And why do they have to make the journey

Day after day after day.

You would think that maybe, just maybe

One day could go by

Where they weren’t making the journey.

But still every day

Like clockwork

Slipping, sliding down

Saline tears leak from eyes

Finding new wrinkles and avoiding old paths

They meander.

It feels like brokenness, heartbreak, fear, and anger

It tastes like despair, like nothing will ever change

And the tears, they shine like loneliness

The killer we all try not to recognize

For who is to blame when it comes to being lonely?

So the tears will continue their cascade

Like the world will spin

The sun will rise and set

And the moon will chase after her

From now until forever

Tears will fall.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

#MeToo

I was 14
He was my track coach
I thought he was one of my best friends
He was 31
#MeToo
~
My brother left me alone
With his friend’s cousin
I didn’t want to
But…
#MeToo
~
He said to me
It’s not over until
I say it’s over
And so it was
#MeToo
~
He also said to me
I love it when you get drunk
You will do anything
When you are drunk
#MeToo
~
Three doctors
They touched me, one causing pain
Lacking all sense of decency
One was a woman
#MeToo
~
At work as a nurse
Arms wrapped too tight
What would he say?
Nothing, he’d knock you out
#MeToo
~
There’s more
Too much more
And I wonder why
I am how I am
#MeToo
~
Every woman
Our young girls
Every vulnerable being
Deserves better
#NoMore
#StandUp
#MeToo

Sometimes Grief

Sometimes grief slips out

When I am least aware.

Like when the person on the radio says something so relatable,

Or the book my child is reading makes a relevant point,

And I feel it well up inside of me.

Throat constricting, tears brimming, nose running.

Usually I feel it and think why?

Why should I care anymore, you have been gone so long?

I should be over this….

Even as the tears slide down my face, and I pretend like I still don’t care.

It doesn’t matter that you were not kind

That you had not the ability to be thoughtful

That you were too broken

To be a caring person

and

That we were not close those last years.

Estrangement does not loosen the grip of grief

Though it can make it difficult

To break down and walk through the stoney cold wall

That was built up for protection.

But every now and then it happens

The proper words, the forgotten song,

The right set and setting…

And only then the grief leaks out, in micro amounts.

A few tears spilling down my cheeks

Silent, heart aching, never ending

A quiet reminder

That you are still missed.

Only then, grief spills out.

 

 

The World Crashes Down

When fear overrides your love

And anxiety shakes your soul

I will bring you peace. 

When the world crashes down

And tears roll forth

I will give you ease.

When the heart shatters again

Everyday an empty heartache

I will bring healing.

You will find me

When you listen closely

Look widely

Hold loosely

For I am right here.

I am here in the quiet morning sunrise

In the gentle summer breeze

And the clouds dancing against a bright blue sky.

I am here in each breath

In the nourishment you take

And in the moment you stop to see me.

I will guide you

Reminding you that you are loved

Even as the world crashes down.

Let Go

I had some good poems
They were written in my head
I awoke in the morning
Only to find the poems were quite dead.
*
I frowned down upon them
And sadly shook my head,
You naughty little things
How could you show up so very dead?
*
They still wouldn’t budge, not even a bit
Crying, sighing, they still remained dead
So I stopped what I was doing
And to the light I lifted my head.
*
“Forgive me great universe
These ones wound up being dead”
I prayed over and over again
A chant forming in my head.

school_of_death_web

(google images)

*
And then I let them go
Farewell poems leaving space inside my head
Searching for those new kind words
Having finally let go of you, dear departed dead.

Until Peace

Until Peace washes over us

We will continue to suffer

And cry for something more

Not knowing which way to go

Until Peace.

Until Peace engulfs us

And reigns from land to land

We will mourn the loss of loved ones

Crying out and wondering why

Until Peace.

Until Peace soothes our souls

There will be war, hate, and fear

Destruction of beauty, loss of life

Deception and corruption abound.

Until Peace.

Until Peace begins with me

And you, each person striving

To be and bring love into this world

We will need to trust and believe, all is well.

Until Peace.